Bastiaan (28) decided to keep having sex with his steady fling during the corona crisis.
Now that COVID-19 has taken hold of the world, and people in the Netherlands have been asked to keep 1.5 meters distance, many single people are struggling. Bastiaan decided to make lemonade out of the lemons life was giving him. "When I heard that we should keep a distance towards others, I panicked. I had a pretty good sex life and I regularly dated via dating apps. I live alone and don't have a steady partner. The idea that I would not have sex for months on end very intense."
At first, Bastiaan continued to chat on dating apps, but it made him feel bad. It never came to a date. "I chatted with guys who didn't seem to care about the measures. To be honest, I also thought at first there was no need to panick, but within a few days I realized that all really have to stick to that 1.5 meters distance. I'd just jerk off a bit more, I decided. " But that quickly became a bit boring. "I don't know if I missed sex or intimacy most. I just wanted to touch someone again, feel someone's body against me. My brother lives together with his girlfriend, and I have friends who keep meeting their boyfriend, even though they do not live together. Are they taking a huge risk?"
Bastiaan to reconsider how strict he had to be. "I wanted to stick to the prescribed measures, but I also felt like having sex. It's as simple as that."He got talking on Whatsapp with a boy he dated a few times before the corona crisis. "It never got serious between us, but we used to have good sex and we sometimes spent whole days together in bed. He turned out to have the same dilemma as I had."
Now Bastiaan and his fling see each other regularly. "We have agreed that neither of us will have sex with anyone else. He also lives alone and we can both work from home. We limit social contacts with other to what is strictly necessary. For example doing groceries. That is a very strict rule, otherwise I am afraid we will run a risk. I know we have to be careful, and we really are. We trust each other." Perhaps this will turn into a real relationship? "Haha no, we really differ too much for that. Before the crisis, we never did any fun things together or anything, our contact was purely physical. It's nice that we can continue to do this. I do notice that in these times, in which you barely see or speak to anyone in for real, I really enjoy snuggling up to him every now and then."
Man tot Man regularly interviews men about how they protect themselves against HIV and STIs as well as their experiences with sex. We believe it is important for people to be well-informed and are able to make informed decisions on how to protect themselves. We hope that the variety of personal stories of people's experiences help them with this. They do not necessarily reflect our standpoint. This story was first published in Winq.nl.
We used a stock photo for this story as Bastiaan wished to remain anonymous.
Text: Martijn Tulp
Stock photo: 123rf.com
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